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Using these insights, we both began introducing each other to awesome people within our respective friend groups, and have been doing so for years.

The friendship-first approach centers around sharing fun and memorable experiences with the people we meet, and seeking to learn their stories and their preferences, free of any overtly sexual or romantic expectations.

Complaining about being “friendzoned” is incredibly harmful to our relationships and can cripple our capacity for both healthy friendships and healthy relationships.

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After going on over 150 dates, trying out over 100 dating websites, and advising hundreds of individuals at all levels of dating experience, one thing consistently stands out to me: .I mentioned my predicament to Jessica, and she excitedly revealed that her good friend had just moved to the city I was visiting.She quickly connected us via Facebook, where her friend and I immediately hit it off and subsequently spent the whole weekend together.Sex and romance can definitely still happen in the context of friendship-first dating, but they are never assumed or expected, and the top priority is always to understand and validate someone’s existing preferences and goals rather than imposing your own goals and expectations upon them.

The concept of being “friendzoned” on an implicit expectation of sex, because it posits friendship as a suboptimal outcome instead of being a worthy end in and of itself.

Using dating sites to find love is inefficient and prone to failure.

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